My confession fwd to Wilson ave

This one came when the illusion finally cracked when I stopped pretending I didn’t know how this would end. I’d felt it for a while, deep down, that quiet knowing you try to drown in hope. But the truth always surfaces, even when you don’t want it to.I wanted to believe he’d miss me the way I missed him …in songs, in flashes , in mementos . But wishing doesn’t make someone show up. He said he cared, that he felt guilty, that he wanted to do better but he never did. Guilt without action is theater. There’s a funny kind of sadness in realizing I was auditioning for a role that never existed.The song came from a space of ache knowing I’d never get what I deserved , but loving anyway. Towards the end there is a shift ,a quiet, almost imperceptible tipping point. I stop chasing. I stop believing. I stop giving him power over my divine being . And for the first time in a long time, I see what grows when I let go: me.